Fart Spray - It’ll Bring A Tear To Your Eye
Is there a better way to disperse a crowd than with a can of Fart Spray? I remember as a kid buying this stuff by the bucketload and attacking girls with it. In hindsight it was probably cutting holes through their lungs but that’s all in the past now!
Fart Spray has many possible uses and here are just a few!
- Like Pepper Spray, it can be used to ward off sexual predators.
- You can use it as a signal for skanky hoes that you are now in mating season. This is an incredibly risky endeavour and leaves you susceptible to face farts from middle aged women.
- It’s great for diluting doggy farts! However you’ve got to be careful with what type of doggy farts you mix it with, the combo of real and fake farts could create an evil mutant fart that would leave you unconscious.
- Use it to ruin your friends blind date by spraying it over his jacket before he leaves.
- It also makes a great insect killer, although nothing beats farting on and killing a wasp naturally!
- Why hire a fog machine for your disco when you can spray out a few cans of this stuff into the room?
- Have you murdered someone recently? Looking to conceal that awful smell in the cellar? Then spray the room down twice daily with a can!
- Do you know someone who’s seriously sensitive to the effects of farts? Well then tip them over the edge by using fart spray just before they enter the room!
- Out on a date tonight with a girl you hate? Then don’t brush your teeth for a month and freshen your mouth down with some fart spray!
- Applying fart spray to one’s groin before intercourse is one way to conceal the horrors of farts during sex!
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