Fart Noises - Fart Clips, Fart Games, Girls Farting and Funny Fart Sounds

Burp Gas and Farts - My Farting Stops.

Arghh I haven’t been farting at all of late even though I’ve been eating shit loads of cheese and stuff. I think my ass is still in silent awe at the brilliance of Mr Methane. Still you’d think that after all of that bad food, my ass would wake up and come up with something extraordinary.

I’ve been burping like crazy though, it’s really annoying. Too much Coke Zero no doubt. Is it just me or does that stuff give you the craps? I haven’t had a solid shat in about a month (which is about as long as I’ve been drinking it).

I can’t seem to keep my burps in at all. It’s the same thing with sneezes, I’ve never understood how women can silence them with so much dignity. When I sneeze or burp, most of the room will know about it. I think one day I’ll give an old man a heart attack with my sneezing, it really is that loud, especially in the winter.

Anyway my farting must improve soon otherwise I think I’ll close this site down. They haven’t even been smelling awful lately either. Could it be that this is merely the eye of the storm and that tonight during my sleep a thunderstorm will brew in my ass causing hurricane force winds? Let’s hope so, I’m bored as hell.

Ah crap my sound card drive won’t work with Vista either so I still can’t record any news ass toots. I might watch that farting granny video again, the last time I played it I could feel my bowels heave. I’m guessing it’ll have the same effect again this time.

March 22nd, 2007
Categories: Flatuence Help and Advice . Author: drepmore . Comments: No Comments

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