Run By Farting - How To Pull It Off Farts On The Run Properly
- Perhaps the best piece of advice I can give you is to carefully select your victim. You want a challenge but you don’t wanna overly exert yourself which excludes both the elderly and olympic sprinters. I’ve found that you get the best chases from angry middle aged men with limps. There’s always the danger that there rage will power them so much that they’ll catch you with ease.
- Try to decide on what angle you’ll fart on the person before you make the approach. Don’t change your mind midway through otherwise things might get a little messy.
- If you must fart on the elderly be prepared to be charged with murder if they keel over with a heart attack. There have over 150 cases in New Jersey alone so far this year.
- You might want to wear a diaper especially for the stunt so that you can give 110% to the fart.
- Remember the police can’t properly charge you of a run by farting unless you kill the person or leave crap at the scene. Either way, do not speak to the police until you have an attorney! Be aware that the police have started to crack down extensively on run-by-farters so you mustn’t give the game away.
- No matter how tempted you are, do not get your friends to film the fact. Posting the videoon Youtube is just asking for trouble.
- If you’re Catholic and you’ve recently committed a fatal run by farting, do not mention it in confession as a recent law has been passed in the Vatican which forces priests to report these crimes to the Police.
- You should try to build up your fitness levels before attempting a run by fart. You might think you can outrun an old lady but you won’t know for definite until she’s hot on your trail! So get on that treadmill and burn some calories!
- Try to limit RBF’s to a maximum of 5 a month otherwise your bowels might just eat themselves out of sheer excitement.
- Remember the aim of the RBf is not to terrorise but to enlighten the unsuspecting public about the beauty of farts!
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